Here's Why Your Cat Gives You "Love" Bites

120 comments

If you're a cat butler (err, owner) you've probably experienced a "love bite" or two. Love bites usually happen in the midst of kitty cuddle time. One minute your kitty will be purring away as you pet them, the next they're nibbling and nipping at your hands. My cat Rascal has a fondness for my chomping down on my knuckles. This odd behavior may leave many cat owners wondering, "Why is my cat biting me out of nowhere?"

Biting is a form of communication for cats. They can bite for more than a few reasons: fear, aggression, defensiveness, or acting territorially. But did you know that many cats give their owners gentle nibbles and nips as a display of affection? Hence the name "Love Bites"! Cats show their affection for us humans in several ways - you just have to know what to look for. 

What is a Love Bite?

Love bites generally start as licks and graduate into gentle nips and nibbles that don't break the skin. Some cat behaviorists believe that love bites are reminiscent of a cat's kittenhood when their mothers would lick and nibble them during grooming. So if your cat is giving you a gentle nibble or lick, it can be seen as a sign of affection.

And believe it or not, though domestic cats aren't usually seen as "social" animals, they actually enjoy participating in what's called "allogrooming." Allogrooming is a social grooming behavior that helps increase bonds among social groups, in this case, you and your kitty; much like a pride of lions

So, how can you tell what is and isn't a love bite? A love bite generally doesn't break the skin. And when your kitty is giving you these gentle nibbles, there won't be other signs of fear or aggression, like hissing, growling, and clawing. Engaging in "love bite" behavior, your cat's body language will be relaxed and calm. 

Overstimulation

However, as most cat owners know: sometimes these gentle nibbles and licks can be a sign that your cat is overstimulated and they're letting you know, gently, that it's time to stop. If you've ever been petting your cat only to have their gentle nibbles escalate suddenly into a harder bite, your cat may be experiencing overstimulation. If you have multiple cats that groom each other, you may notice this behavior during grooming time, too. 

Cats may experience overstimulation due to the sensitivity of their hair follicles - after an extended period of petting or pressure, it can begin to hurt and cause discomfort in cats. Gentle nips may be your cat letting you know petting time is over; these warnings may be paired with other signs of discomfort, such as tail swishing or flicking, skin twitching over the back, flattening of the ears, freezing, tenseness or staring, quick head turn to watch your hand as you pet, pupillary dilation, or walking away and lying down. 

 

How to Stop "Love Bites"

While love bites can often be a sign of affection, they can still hurt or cause discomfort to us cat owners. It's okay to discourage this behavior.

1. When your cat gives you love bites, don't quickly pull your hand away. Instead, stop moving your hand altogether until the nibbles stop, then move your hand. Cats are visual predators and the movement of your hand may encourage their prey drive and make them chomp down harder, purely out of instinct. 

Don't yell at or swat your cat, as this may result in fearful or aggressive behavior. Instead, use a reward system, such as treats, when the cat shows appropriate behavior. 

2. If your cat gives you love bites a little too often, try a hands-off play style. Use interactive toys such as a variety of wand toys or even an app-controlled cat toy to encourage bonding with your cat without the love bites.

 

Does your cat give you love bites? Let us know in the comments! 

 


120 comments


  • Koenraad Van Geert

    The term “love bite” is a misnomer, a problematic one also because it’s very misleading. It causes people to misinterpret their cat’s behavior. There is no such thing as a love bite. It means your cat either doesn’t like where on his body you’re touching him or he’s done with petting. So instead of continuing petting him you should stop. Bites that are hurtful or even cracking skin are signs of aggression. Cats doing this have behavior problems.


  • Mary

    Wow…does my cat love ME (and my husband). He gives “love nips” all the time—and I have developed a phrase “Kitties nip because they don’t have lips.” It gets tiring (particularly in the bathroom) but hey—we’re loved—we’re REALLY loved. We have another (feral) kitty that doesn’t know how to play (even with fellow felines)—doesn’t know how to show affection and gets truly scared at anything—any strange noise or even sometimes movement. It’s three years now since we’ve had our “furiously and frightened feral” but I’m hoping for gentle kitty nips in the future.


  • ALEX

    Wonderful blog content! I liked your post. I would like to mention a website writing amazing blogs on 7 things you definitely didn’t know about love bites https://holisticfoods.com/how-to-give-love-bites-and-facts/


  • Jess

    John Jansen you are literally a psychopath. Found your Pinterest account from your comment details. Unsurprisingly it’s countless creepy folders containing pictures of women, obsessively categorised (johnjansen90260).
    Next step, your address so I can report you to the authorities. You harm cats, others use their abilities to track down those who hurt cats.


  • Anthony DeMaria

    I have 2 British Shorthairs ( brothers) Ozzie and Konerko, I’m a big Chicago White Sox fan , hence the name. Personalities are night and day. Both are affectionate, however in different ways Ozzie likes to wake me up in morning by jumping on me for attention and petting, however occasionally he will nip me I need to be careful since I have thin skin on my hands. I know the nipping is a sign of affection and I deal with it. On the otherhand , Konerko waits to later without nipping
    I have a picture of both of them together in the liter with 4 other siblings They are the greatest companions and wouldn’t trade them for them for a million dolllars
    By the way, they are 5 years old now.😼😼


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